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9 Simple Ways to Engage in Understanding & Sovereign Self Expression

Updated: Oct 18, 2022

A few months ago my brother called me frustrated. Something had come up in the family & he asked if I would help him deal with it. I was calm, listened, let him vent, & told him I'd handle it (because I could & I wanted to). A few hours later he called back to thank me, check in, & make sure we were good (which we totally were).

This was an evolved interaction for us. A previous version of me would have probably taken his frustrations out of context & felt like he was blaming me. Even if I held it together & didn't get defensive, I would have gotten off the phone & started to spin on what I 'should have done to prevent the situation (which was out of my control) from happening in the first place. As for him... I could speculate on what a previous version may have done (likely, less evolved as well) but I'd rather acknowledge that he called, asked for what he needed, & checked back in. It was an honest & respectful interaction & I appreciated it a lot.

I share this story because communication gets better when you work at it! Even... with those you have a strong pattern or dynamics with.

Of course, you can't control how others will behave & sometimes you won't be met (no matter how hard you try)... But you can cultivate the steadiness & clarity to truly & say what you need to say when you need to say it.

To help you do this I've made you a 2022 CHEAT SHEET

Print it. Put it on the wall. Come back to it again & again.

Regardless of whether you are dealing with interpersonal communication or creative self expression, these 9 Tips will help you Articulate in Resonance.

1: Locate Yourself

Your body & nervous system are infinitely intelligent. When you are present to this internal compass you meet the world & yourself with greater honesty. Orient yourself by slowly taking your visual field. Become aware of your sensations, emotions, & breath. Is your heart beating fast or slow? Give yourself time to settle. Whether speaking, singing, or listening to another begin by anchoring first ~ inside your Self.

2. Clarify Your Heart's Intention

With practice our intentions become the lived expression of our values & spirit. Tune in. What is it that you seek or long for in this expression? Is it Connection? Respect? Belonging? Marshal Rosenberg teaches in Non-violent communication that every action stems from a basic human need. Even when a strategy is ineffective (i.e. blaming, worrying) or a situation is painful (i.e. envy, anger, hurt) there is usually something fundamental our heart is craving. Locate this desire & hold it as an intention for everyone involved (i.e. mutual respect, mutual understanding). It will direct your dialogue towards greater empathy, openness, & honesty around what is possible.

3. Listen to Understand.

True listening never degrades your message or purpose. Instead, it allows you clarify your understanding, expand upon points of connection, & better address the nuances of your disagreement. When you listen to understand you demonstrate maturity & cultivate trust, increasing your likelihood of being heard & understood.

4. Practice Respect.

Each person dwells within the framework of their histories, communities, & biology. The human experience is diverse & every story has something to teach us. When you practice respect you open yourself to learning the intricacies of another. Through respectful communication & boundaries you teach others how you wish to be treated. By offering respect, even when another's actions or words are 'disrespectful' you maintain your integrity & demonstrate a lesson deeper than retribution could ever teach.

5. Map Your Voice to Your Body & Breath

Every exhale is an opportunity for surrender. Every part of your of your body inhabits a different felt sense, tone, & intention. Tune your expression to the release of your breath, the strength of core, & the connection of your heart. This will help you to calm your mind & speak your truth in resonance with your being.

6: Honour the Mysteries of Timing

The timing of one's growth & understanding is unique to every person & situation. You can't control the responses of others, but you can cultivate your own intuition & trust. Listen with your whole body. Speak when you soul needs to speak. And cultivate trust by honouring the space between words, reception, conversations, mis-steps, & celebration. We all evolve in our own timing.

7. Cultivate Curiosity, Wonder, & Play

As adults it’s easy to lose ourselves in the seriousness of life. Yet, we learn best as children do… with space for play, curiosity, & wonder. Spend time in the awe of of nature. Be silly. Play. You may soon find that this lightheartedness weaves its way into your relationships ~ forging greater intimacy & resilience.

8: Sing From Your Soul

Your voice is medicine. When you sing from your soul you foster a connection between your voice & the deepest parts of your Self. This is not about performing or pleasing sounds. It's your birthright of expression. Sing from your soul & welcome all of it ~ the highs of your triumphs, to the sobs of your grief, the guttural noises that vocalize what words cannot. This is a sanctuary where emotions can move, intuition deepens, & your system regulates through the medicine of your voice.

9. Own Your Self

Self esteem & capacity are built through the ownership we take for ourself, our choices, & our reactions to circumstance. This is an excavation of the highest order ~ to gently acknowledge where we have been moved by love, connection, agenda, o fear. As you recognize & own what’s yours you simultaneously release yourself from the guilt of what is not. When you make repair with yourself & others you instil the skills of humility & growth... aligning to the resonance of your soul.

Is it time to step into your voice & courageously say what you need to say (when you need to say it) in your life & relationships? Book a Free Consult Right Now & lets set the course for a more confident & expressive you.

About the Author.

Amy Thiessen is an international somatic voice & communications coach who helps women inhabit greater comfort in their bodies & express themselves with clarity, courage, & resonance through group programs & 1:1 coaching. Under the artist name ‘Sundari Studios’ she offers hypnotic devotional musical performance & production designed to uplift the spirit & awaken the heart. Thiessen's music & work has been featured on TED X, Wanderlust, Embodylab Summits (Embodied Yoga & MindBody Therapy) & alongside international teachers Janet Stone & Megan Currie.

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1 Comment

John Abraham
John Abraham
Dec 18, 2023

True listening is a skill that can transform relationships. This tip encourages us to prioritize understanding over being understood fostering trust and deeper connections through mature and respectful engagement. Professional Pool Cleaning Services in Henderson NV

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