Updated: Oct 3
Let's be honest.
Everyone encounters limiting beliefs that impact their ability to express themselves with the clarity, grace, or confidence they desire. Oftentimes, these internal stories go unnoticed - simply unconscious programs we picked up through implicit or explicit learning.
We don't realize these myths are impacting us, instead, we wonder why…
~ Why was it so difficult to speak up for myself?
~ Why was I so emotionally reactive when it really wasn't a big deal?
~ Why does my mind go blank or my throat close up right when it’s time to speak?
~ Why am I still running that same conversation in my head?
~ Why is my voice so shaky?
Well, one reason may be that one of these unconscious programs is creating havoc in your system; making it physically difficult to express yourself (tight throat, feelings of terror), mentally challenging to express yourself (self-doubt, critical self-talk) or likely a combination of both.
The good news is that these internal stories can be rewritten!
We do this by creating new - more true narratives in our minds.
By experiencing the felt sense of these truths through your voice & your body.
Let’s take a look at these myths & begin rewriting the story of your voice.
Myth 1: Your Voice is Not Important.
Where you may have learned it: Authoritarian parenting. Ideals such as “children should be seen & not heard.” Family dynamics (other siblings’ voices are more important, family hierarchy), lack of being met in the expression of your needs or emotions.
How it shows up in adulthood: Unable to recognize how you feel, what you want, or what you need; Unable to protest unfair treatment or recognize it in the first place; believing your thoughts, experiences, or opinions don't matter; feeling overly responsible for everyone else’s experiences. Or, the opposite - demanding & controlling your environment to ensure your needs are met even at the expense of others.
Mental Rewrites: My voice matters. My inner child’s voice matters. I have the right to share my opinions, speak my truth, negotiate for my needs & protest unfair treatment. I show respect for myself by listening & honouring my voice.
Practice ~ Declaration
Settle into the steadiness of your legs & strength of your belly. Place a hand o your belly & with a strong & assertive voice (connected to your belly) speak the words chosen above.
Gently touch your heart. From a tender voice, as though your heart is speaking - speak the words chosen from above
Plan a hand on your head. From a voice that connects from your pelvis to your head (i.e. as though you are speaking from your whole body) speak your statement & again.